Lucy Pireel's All That's Written

I started out with high hopes since I love fairy tales, romance and a saucy read, but from the onset of the story it didn't quite sit well. Seeing as I'm a determined person and when I want to read for review I will finish a book where I would have put it away after the second chapter if I hadn't promised a review.

I'm glad I did, because it did turn out to be a reasonable read, but there's too much not quite right in it for me to recommend it or rate it high.

Now let's see what I found so disturbing.

The main character has been in the tower 11yrs, (since her teens) yet she knows she's one of the tallest members of WITCH? How can she know if she's not been in the community for that long?

"The prophet once told Nel she had experienced the cruelty of men before she discovered Mother’s teachings,…" Somehow I thought Mother Gothel was the prophet, but this sentence makes me think it are two separate persons. So who's bringing supplies then the prophet or Mother Gothel, and who is the prophet? Who's Mother? And if there's no men in WITCH where do children come from?

Too many questions taking me out off what could be a great story, and then the no men and children situation is explained from the pov of the man. 

But the confusion about whether or not the prophet and Mother Gothel are one or not remains until later on Nel (the mc explains that Mother is a godlike entity she doesn't believe in)

Then there's the less than perfect choice of words "he filled his oversized jacket". If he fills his jacket it is not oversized.

There's punctuation missing here and there, or is there where it should not be. "… a few days' shelter…" 'days" should not have an apostrophe. 

And there's the contradictions, I'll point out one that stood out to me. 

"There was something about him, a sense of strength and the promise of protection that made her feel oddly safe, even though the truth was clearly the opposite."

This indicates he's clearly a danger to her, or so she perceives, but in the next sentence she thinks "…no reason to believe he had every intention of hurting her."

That contradicts the last, important fragment of the previous sentence. Threw me right out off the story.

And the author makes her character feel and realise a lot, taking me out off her head and no longer being there with the character, but looking in from the outside. I would have thought that a book published by a trade publishing house would not allow for this much use of filters or errors.

And then a scene I can only describe as possible leading up to a rape! I don't care there is described that the girl feels things which are supposed to make me think she wants this, his demeanour and her confusion can lead me to no other conclusion than that he he should not touch her, or even contemplating it! Full stop! Or Period, depending on where you are. And the next part, in his pov makes it even worse, because there it is explained that even though he doesn't call it rape, he full well knows she's confused and has no idea what she feels or how to react and even recognises her fear, he still goes for her! At this point I wanted to put down the book, but since I'm committed to review it, I had to read on. Luckily I did, because soon enough it became clear that even the author thought it might be a bit too much and changed her mind. No sex followed he 'merely' trapped her, but it was very unsettling to read. Not a good thing in my mind. Especially when he goes on to being an overpowering asshole who at that point still wants to take advantage of a clear weakness in his objective.

Right, back to the nit picks. Missing, and or strange actions. The man dropped her magazine from the Glock, hands back the weapon, but not the magazine and yet she reloads it hen he hands back the pistol. How can she without the mag?

Or when he needs to block a window with a bookcase and does so by pushing it along the floor. Yet the next sentence tells us it was light enough for him to have been able to pick it up and carry it over in no time. Why didn't he then?

Jeans are being taken off without removal of shoes, yet the socks are coming off. Where did the shoes go?

Then it turns out she's been 'had' against her will by her female best friend before she went to the tower too. What is this? The female lead is the eternal, stupid victim?

Then there's the typos.

page 40 "She eyes lost focus…"

page 48 "…for the it to almost …"

As you can see there's a lot of things that were there which had they not been made this a more than enjoyable read, but as is I can only say, missed opportunity. Or it might be I am just too nit picky, but hey, I like my romance reads to be crisp, clean, undisturbing and well edited.